Sample Essay: Should Marine Mammals Be in Captivity?

Should Marine Mammals Be in Captivity?
by Sharon Banta

In my opinion there is no doubt that marine mammals should NOT be held in captivity. Marine mammals are a part of nature and should not be bought, sold or thrown in an aquarium. I believe that they have the right to be kept in their natural environment.

I have many convincing reasons to support my opinion. Captivity causes many health problems in marine mammals. Many tanks have water full of chemicals and bacteria; this results in blindness and many skin problems in dolphins and other marine mammals. Marine mammals in captivity die from pneumonia, ulcers and other stress-related diseases. Most of these helpless creatures suffer from boredom. Dolphins in the wild can swim up to 40–100 miles per day but in pools they go around swimming in repetitive patterns. Due to boredom and limited space many dolphins abuse themselves; they often bang their heads against tank and aquarium walls.

Some of these poor innocent creatures face abusive treatment by their caretakers, thus shortening their life span. In fact Keiko, the killer whale, the star of Free Willy, was a victim of this type of abuse. It was known to be said that he was 1,000 pounds underweight and developed a wartlike disease. His teeth were ground down from chewing the sides of the pool due to boredom and he had a problem with his dorsal fin.

Marine mammals breed very poorly in captivity with very high infant death rates. For this reason, when a baby dolphin is born into captivity its birth is usually kept a secret from its mother until it shows signs of survival. Marine mammals do breed in captivity, but the birth rate in captivity is not as successful as in the wild.

Many people think that marine mammals should remain in captivity. I realize that some people may believe that captivity increases the life span of certain animals, but the truth is if these creatures are so happy in captivity, why do they die so fast? Captivity shortens animal life spans, not increases them. Wild dolphins can live 40 years in the wild and orcas can live 90 years, but when held in captivity they rarely survive their teens. Twenty-three out of 25 orcas have died in captivity. Some people think that holding animals in captivity helps with study and research. But the truth is scientists prefer to learn about animals in their natural environment so they get firsthand knowledge.

In conclusion, I think marine mammals should definitely not be held in captivity. I think Gandhi said it best when he mentioned, "The greatness of a nation and its moral process can be measured by the way its animals are treated." In a world where much of nature and the wild has already been lost to us, it is up to us to let these beautiful marine mammals free.

Persuasive Writing Link

Here's another link to a site with a thorough explanation of how to do persuasive writing.

http://www.orangeusd.k12.ca.us/yorba/persuasive_writing.htm

How to Write an Essay

Brainstorming
One method for narrowing down your topic is called brainstorming. Brainstorming is a useful way to let ideas you didn't know you had come to the surface.

1. Sit down with a pencil and paper, or at your computer, and write whatever comes into your head about your topic, no matter how confused or disorganized.
2. Keep writing for a short but specific amount of time, say 3–5 minutes. Don't stop to change what you've written or to correct spelling or grammar errors.
3. After a few minutes, read through what you have written. You will probably throw out most of it, but some of what you've written may give you an idea you can develop.
4. Do some more brainstorming and see what else you can come up with.

Organize Your Ideas
Develop an outline to organize your ideas. An outline shows your main ideas and the order in which you are going to write about them. Click here to see some sample outlines.

1. Write down all the main ideas.
2. List the subordinate ideas below the main ideas.
3. Avoid any repetition of ideas.

Write a First Draft
I. Every essay or paper is made up of three parts:

1. Introduction
2. Body
3. Conclusion

The introduction is the first paragraph of the paper. It often begins with a general statement about the topic and ends with a more specific statement of the main idea of your paper. The purpose of the introduction is to let the reader know what the topic is inform the reader about your point of view arouse the reader's curiosity so that he or she will want to read about your topic
The body of the paper follows the introduction. It consists of a number of paragraphs in which you develop your ideas in detail.

Limit each paragraph to one main idea. (Don't try to talk about more than one idea per paragraph.)

Prove your points continually by using specific examples and quotations.
Use transition words to ensure a smooth flow of ideas from paragraph to paragraph.

The conclusion is the last paragraph of the paper. Its purpose is to
summarize your main points, leaving out specific examples
restate the main idea of the paper

Revise the First Draft
Try to set aside your draft for a day or two before revising. This makes it easier to view your work objectively and see any gaps or problems.
Revising involves rethinking your ideas, refining your arguments, reorganizing paragraphs, and rewording sentences. You may need to develop your ideas in more detail, give more evidence to support your claims, or delete material that is unnecessary. For more advice on revising and a sample revision, click here.
Read your paper out loud. This sometimes makes it easier to identify writing that is awkward or unclear.
Have somebody else read the paper and tell you if there's anything that's unclear or confusing.

Proofread the Final Draft
Look for careless errors such as misspelled words and incorrect punctuation and capitalization.
Errors are harder to spot on a computer screen than on paper. If you type your paper on a computer, print out a copy to proofread. Remember, spell checkers and grammar checkers don't always catch errors, so it is best not to rely on them too much.

How to Write a Persuasive Essay

The purpose of a persuasive essay is to convince the reader to agree with your viewpoint or to accept your recommendation for a course of action. For instance, you might argue that the salaries of professional athletes are too high. Or you might recommend that vending machines be banned from your school cafeteria. A successful persuasive essay will use evidence to support your viewpoint, consider opposing views and present a strong conclusion.

Some people worry that adopting a school uniform policy would be too expensive. However, there are ways to lessen the cost. For example, in Seattle, Washington, local businesses help to pay for uniforms at South Shore Middle School. In Long Beach, California, graduating students donate or sell their old uniforms.

Use evidence to support your viewpoint. Statistics, facts, quotations from experts and examples will help you to build a strong case for your argument. Appeal to the reader’s sense of logic by presenting specific and relevant evidence in a well-organized manner.

Consider opposing views. Try to anticipate the concerns and questions that a reader might have about your subject. Responding to these points will give you the chance to explain why your viewpoint or recommendation is the best one.

Present a strong conclusion. All your evidence and explanations should build toward a strong ending in which you summarize your view in a clear and memorable way. The conclusion in a persuasive essay might include a call to action.

TIP: Use a pleasant and reasonable tone in your essay. Sarcasm and name-calling weaken an argument. Logic and fairness will help to keep it strong.

Essay Tips for Final Exam

Here is a website that offers good information for writing an essay.

http://www2.actden.com/Writ_den/tips/essay/index.htm

You can also click on the following links to find out more about each topic:

Parts of an Essay:
Introduction
Supporting Paragraphs
Summary Paragraph

How to Write an Essay:
Prewriting Essays
Writing Essays
Editing Essays

Writing II E221 - Course Description

Hi Everybody.

For your information, here is a copy of the course description: http://docs.google.com/Doc?id=dcrvjp43_33q3xt5


p.s.: Keep writing in your journals.

Want to go to London????

Hello students:

I wanted to pass along some information about a Public Speaking Competition that will be held on March 7th and March 14th in Sanaa and ADEN that the English Speaking Union of Yemen is organizing. Two lucky winners will get to go to LONDON to compete at the international level.

Requirements: Speaker must be between 16-20 years old on Thursday 17 May 2007 and be full-time students. Competitors must be Yemeni citizens.

Maybe you or somebody you know qualifies and would be a good candidate. For more information, see the document I just posted that gives contact information and important dates.

http://docs.google.com/Doc?id=dcrvjp43_2ftkpmk

Interested students for this competition must see the 2007 International Public Speaking Competition Handbook so as to be aware of the rules and structure of the competition.

You may contact:

(1) Sheikh Tariq Abdullah
ESU Yemen Chairman,
Fax: 02 251638, Aden
Email: relevant@y.net.ye

(2) Elizabeth White
British Council, Director, Sanaa
Fax: 01 448360
Email: Elizabeth.White@ye.britishcouncil.org

(3) Mustafa Rajamanar
ESU Yemen Secretary
Fax: 02 255044, Aden
Email: british-consulat@yemen.net.ye

Shabab Yemeni website

Hello Everyone. Hope you had a nice break during the semesters.

Here is an interesting website that I found online: http://www.shababyemeni.com/

From their website:
"As a pure youth effort, Shabab Yemeni (SY) is a youth newsletter established in May 2004. SY is a non-partisan, independent newsletter with a goal to share knowledge, experiences, and resources among Yemeni youth."

It's made by Yemeni youth for the Yemeni youth. (young Yemenis like most of you.)

They're also having a photography and writing contest with $$$ prizes. Check out the site and then look for the link for the Youth Photography and Writing Contest. (Deadline March 20, 2007). Good luck!

2007 NEA-SA Undergraduate Exchange Program Application Form

The US Embassy wanted me to announce this to students at Aden University. This is an undergraduate scholarship program which provides for six months to one year of study (non-degree) at a U.S. university for students either in their gap year or who are currently enrolled.

To see the application visit this address:

http://docs.google.com/Doc?id=dcrvjp43_1fpsdbx


I put this there, but some of the formatting is not correct. So, if you want me to email you a copy of the original application, then just email me: teachermiguel@gmail.com

Go for it!